I’m just coming off my “Self-Love Secrets Week” held in my private Facebook group and it’s still all I can think about.
Self-love is something I’ve read up on all my life, but I enjoyed digging into it especially hard for the past month. So much so, I’m considering creating a course!
I always thought self-love was something that would make me feel better about myself, especially in terms of looks, since that was the place I felt I was lacking self-love and confidence the most. But self-love isn’t just about feeling good, pretty, or accepted.
Self-love is so much more and a lack of it, will hold us back in more ways than we know.
I think of self-love as the relationship we have with ourselves. It’s not just accepting certain things about us or treating ourselves better, instead it is about what kind of friend, lover, sister, mother, daughter you are to YOU.
Yes, you read that right.
We play so many roles every day. And in those roles, we worry about others. We do our best not to let people down. We show compassion. We show grace. We build others up. We see all the good and potential in others they can’t always see in themselves- and we remind them of it. We allow for plenty of forgiveness. We’re amazing. No doubt about it.
But can you say the same about the way you treat yourself?
Are you harsh? Unforgiving? Do you hold yourself to extremely high expectations? Do you talk down to yourself? Are your thoughts discouraging? Do you constantly fall back on the promises you make to yourself?
Imagine coming across this among dating/friendship profiles:
Looking for a relationship with someone who doesn’t mind being constantly let down. I’ll rarely see the good in you and most likely won’t notice all the things you’re capable of doing. I’m not big on celebrating your successes, because let’s be honest, that’s nothing compared to what you really want. I’m a realist. I’d rather focus on where you keep failing and what you need to improve on instead of getting caught up in the mushy “I think I can” thoughts. My biggest plus: I’m REALLY good at showing you over and over that my words and commitments can’t be trusted, so you’ll never keep your hopes up for too long.
Is THIS what you want in your relationship with you?
But often this is who we are, especially when we are all alone with our thoughts, dreams, hopes, and frustrations.
And it holds us back from what we want.
How can you move forward, follow your dreams, get the promotion, lose the weight if you’ve proven over and over that you CAN’T be trusted to keep your word?
You may not consciously think of yourself this way, but trust me, your subconscious is paying attention and it knows when you need to be on guard.
The truth is, if you aren’t achieving what you want on the outside, you need to focus on taking care of the inside.
A weak relationship with yourself will block you from what you want every time.
If you want to work on your most important relationship, head over to my private Facebook group Laugh, Flourish, and Create Your Way to a Life You Love, where you’ll get resources and great conversation to build up your self-love, self-awareness, and your personal power to achieve your very best.